Category: IU basketball

“The beginnings and endings of all human undertakings are untidy.”

November 18, 2008November 19, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

Comparing Daniel Moore to Erik Suhr is an undersell. He reminds me much more or Tom Coverdale. He’s not as big, but he has the same sneaky speed and deliberate, but effective, dribble moves. He also walks with that same swagger that Coverdale had.

We got a lot of help from Northwestern State. They made more unforced turnovers than we’ve ever going to see again.

We’re not a good rebounding team. Yet.

I am going to be nervous a lot this year. I can’t count high enough to give you an accurate assessment of how many times I inhaled sharply in what I can only describe as “the same way I reacted whenever Todd Lindeman dribbled.”

We have more hustle than smarts right now. When we play as smart as we do hard we’re going to be a very solid team.

I was impressed with the play of both Jones and Dumes. Aside from youth, the biggest knock on Jones is that he’s so skinny Bluto and Popeye would fight for his affections.

Jobe’s footwork has me in constant fear that someone is going to emergency.

Devan Dumes gets his hair cut by Jamal Meeks, or so I assume.

I’m going to put the over/under for Harbaugh mentions this season at 1500.

Why is there an ad for WNIT on the floor? That’s just awful.

I did not hear four syllables, five claps once tonight. I’m proud of you guys.

And finally, the theme song for this game. Listen at your on risk. This song is pretty bad. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, bad.

“By the way, I’m aware of the irony. . .

November 15, 2008October 8, 2015by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

of appearing on TV in order to decry it. So don’t bother pointing it out”

Friends, I want to talk to you about predictions, punduntry. Preposterous!

I have read over and over again how IU is going to finish last in the Big Ten and be lucky to win 10 games. These predictions are based, largely on no available data.

The logic goes something like this.

Given: Indiana has only one returning scholarship athlete from last year. They have a team made up of freshmen, walk-ons and two JuCo transfers. They only have three players over 6’6″.

Conclusion: They are going to be awful.

Here’s my problem with that logic, it’s missing a crucial middle step. There is no previous data on which to base that conclusion. There has never been a team constructed in this manner. It’s very much like Dana Barrett’s apartment that way. Nobody EVER made them like this.

So, based on no observable data (many of these predictions came before anyone saw this team play at all) you have concluded this will be the worst team in the Big Ten and struggle to win 10 games.

I cry shenanigans!

While I will admit there is no reason to pick this team to win the Big Ten, there’s also little reason to pick them to finish in the cellar.

We lack size and experience. But there are a lot of teams with both size and experience that are terrible, so that can’t be your entire argument, can it?

We have kids who can shoot. We have kids who can handle the ball. Anyone can play defense if they want to and are taught how.

We have kids who want to be here. Kids who wanted so badly to be Hoosiers that the decided to come despite everything that has happened over the last two years and the uncertainty that lies ahead. That is dedication. That is heart.

If you have kids who can shoot and handle the ball, who are dedicated and willing to work all you need is a good coach to make them competitive.

We’ve certainly got that.

I know we’ve been told to keep our expectations low this year, and I think that’s wise. It’s always better to be pleasantly surprised that horribly disappointed. But I just can’t believe we’re going to be as bad as everyone says we’re going to be.

Maybe I’m Dr. Pangloss, but I just don’t think so. Who honestly thinks it’s going to be harder to watch this team play than it was to watch Mike Davis’ team stand around and watch Bracey Wright dribble and shoot our way to a losing record?

The worst is behind us. There’s nothing to do but celebrate this team. Even if they only win 10 games (which I don’t. I think we’re going to be much closer to .500 than anyone is willing to say) they are going to be competitive. They are going to improve. They are going to work.

This will be a better brand of basketball than we’ve seen in quite a while. And I’m making my prediction (which I’ve just finished telling you is a preposterous thing to do, cause who am I Kreskin?) that we’re going to be battling to start our Big Ten Tournament on Friday, and may well be playing in the NIT.

The Rock says

November 13, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

The redheaded step children of the state of Indiana have their panties in a bunch, once again.

The continual bitching about lack of respect, lack of coverage, etc. has begun by our friends from West Lafayette.

“IU’s going to suck this year. Purdue is favored to win the Big Ten. Matt Painter has done a fantastic job. Indiana fans just want to live in the past. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.”

I would like to address these various complaints one at a time.

1.) IU’s gonna suck this year.

Check back later for a longer argument as to why this isn’t accurate. The short version is we’re young, sure, but we’re committed, motivated and have a terrific coach. Not entirely unlike Purdue last year.

2.) Yes, they are. And they should be. Enjoy this season. You’ve got a great group of players.

3.) Yes, he has. Purdue did a fantatic job transitioning from Gene Keady to Matt Painter, and it takes a man to do that. (50 bonus points if you know to what that references.) Matt Painter coaches a great style of basketball. I’m a Hoosier, but I find it hard to hate a program that is doing things the way Purdue is doing them. Good for you guys.

4.) Three thousand years of beautiful tradition, from Moses to Sandy Koufax, you’re goddamn right I’m living in the past! Walter Sobchak was right.

Recent events excluded, the history of Indiana basketball is fantastic and worth embracing. Which is something I will be doing frequently here.

So, Purdue fans, I’m sorry that you don’t feel like you get the respect that you deserve. You’ve got a great team this year, one that should be fun to watch.

And I’m sorry if this hurts your feelings, but you are not IU basketball. You are not going to magically become IU basketball just because we hired a jack ass two years ago and you have a good team.

So, The Rock says this, KNOW YOUR ROLE AND SHUT YOUR MOUTH!!

Four Syllables (Five Claps)

November 11, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

I am here today to make a solumn plea. A plea to all who plan on heading to a game in Assembly Hall this year.

Don’t think of this as a favor to me, though it may feel that way to you, and certainly will feel that way to me. Think of it, instead as the right thing to do.

Stand with me now, as the kids from Shaw did with the kids of West Beverly when the school boards cancelled the homecoming game because of the shootings at Shaw and Brandon invited the Shaw kids to the dance, to form a circle. In this circle we will find the support from one another that we need to make a change in this world. This circle will represent our commitment to end, once and for all, the abuse of the four syllable (five clap) cheer.

You know the one I’m talking about. Here are a few examples. A-J Moy-E (clap, clap, clap, clap, clap), Er-Ic Gor-Don (clap, clap, clap, clap, clap).

This cheer has become a crutch. Fans in attendence want to use this cheer to express any positive emotion.

And what’s worse, if the words do not contain four syllables, people try to make it work anyway. D-J Whi-Ite (clap, clap, clap, clap, clap) To-Om Cre-Ean (clap, clap, clap, clap, clap).

I get douche chills every time I hear it.

How can we accomplish this feat? I hear you ask. I’m only one man.

To papaphrase Arlo Guthrie.

There’s one thing you can do and that’s walk into the Assembly Hall, just walk in say to a cheerleader, “Cheerleader, I’m not going do that cheer.” And sit down.

You know, if one person, just one person does it they may think he’s really sick and they won’t ask him.

And if two people, two people do it, in harmony, they may think they’re a couple and they won’t ask either of them.

And three people do it, three, can you imagine, three people walking in sayin’ they won’t do that cheer and sitting down. They may think it’s an organization.

And can you, can you imagine fifty people a game, I said fifty people a game walking in sayin’ they won’t do that cheer and sitting down. And friends they may thinks it’s a movement.

And that’s just what it is Four Syllable (Five Clap) Anti-Massacre Movement.

Just like being there, without all the good parts

November 10, 2008November 10, 2008by Jeff Taylor2 Comments

I haven’t been to Assembly Hall for a basketball game in a few years, not since they’ve installed the super-shiney noew scoreboard in fact. I only mention it because if you never saw a game there prior to the new scoreboard set-up, this won’t make as much sense to you, but imagine if you will.

As a student, when I got my season tickets, here’s how it used to work. You would get eight games. Four of them were good seats, i.e. lower level or floor seating,, and four bad seat games. Mostly that meant balcony. What you never wanted to see on your stub was sections A, F, G, or M above roughly row 36. This would put you on the main level, but high enough up that you were under the balcony. You could see the game, but you’d have to ask the guy three rows down what the score was.

Now, imagine sitting in those seats, and then being forced to shut your eyes every 20 or 30 seconds.

That’s roughly what it was like watching the IU v. Anderson game on the Big Ten Networks live streaming on Friday.

There were no announcers calling the game, which I didn’t really mind so much. Just having the crowd noise and Chuck Crabb made it feel more like being there. There were also no graphics, which meant no score or clock information. After about the first two minutes I had no idea what the score was.

Add to all that wonderful-ness, the streaming was terrible. It was choppy, sometimes it would freeze completely (mostly when we had the ball and were about to score), then it would fast forward the action or just jump forward, there was a strange lag between the audio and the video, so that you would be watching one thing and hear Chuck Crabb call another.

I have no idea how well we played on Friday, and it pisses me off.

Would the Big Ten Network do something for me? I’ll even give you a few choices.

1.) Put the games on TV

2.) Failing that, add the score to the feed so we can at least try to keep up with what’s going on.

3.) Failing both of those options, rerun the game on TV, so at least we can see the game without overcoming your technical problems.

The Big Ten Network is doing a fantastic job of fucking up a perfectly good concept. Koudos, gentlemen. Koudos.

In which we start another season of IU basketball

November 7, 2008October 8, 2015by Jeff Taylor1 Comment

Tonight it begins.

The process of moving forward.

Indiana finally plays a basketball game with Tom Crean at the helm.

In some ways I can’t believe we’re ready to tip-off another basketball season. In many, many other ways this day could not come soon enough.

It is no longer the 2007-2008 season. Kelvin Sampson is long gone, so are almost all of his players. We have the youngest team in the history of college basketball (Packer Method). We have, as Kyle Taber is still recovering, no real game experience. We are starting roughly 12 freshmen and a JuCo player.

Tom Crean has kept practices closed to the public, Norman Dale style, so we have very little idea what to expect from this team.

We’ve been told they can shoot. We’ve been told their small. We know they’re young.

Tom Crean wants to run. He wants them to play defense. He’s scared as hell they won’t be able to rebound.

He’s done a fantastic job of lowering expectations. He keeps reminding us that the measure of this team’s success cannot be counted in the Win-Loss columns. It can only be counted in improvement. Do they learn? Do they show that they understand the system? Do they put forth the effort needed to be competitive? Do they work on and off the court to earn the right to wear that uniform?

Maybe I’m the perpetual optimist (see: the fact that I still watch IU football year after year when with the exception of last year Lucy pulls it away right before I’m ready to kick the ball every time) but I have a tough time believing that this team will be as bad as Mike Davis’s 14-15 squad. That team may have had more talent, and experience, but this team has a MUCH better coach. They’re young and small, but they will play with desire and heart, and they will not give the ball to Bracey and watch.

I think that trying to accurately predict how a team will finish when you’ve never seen any of them play at this level before is an exercise in futility. It’s punditry at it’s best.

So, here I sit, anxiously awaiting the ability to form my own opinion, based on more than my hopes. Based on more than my belief that Karma will take care of us for doing what was right and blowing up our entire program.

I don’t know that I can hazard a prediction about our record this year, but what I can say, with almost total certainty, is that this year will be better than the last.

GO HOOSIERS!!!

And the hits just keep on coming

October 12, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

I have been trying, over the course of the last few years, to become interested in the NBA. For years, and I’m talking nearly 20, the style of play in the NBA has been such that I have had 0.0 interest in watching any of the games.

The style of play has changed and improved greatly over the last few years. Less one on one, more team play, better defense. Just better basketball all the way around.

But I still couldn’t get interested in a team or a player enough to sit down and watch a game in it’s entirety.

The final piece to the puzzle seemed to be in place for me to truly grow an interest. There are now three IU players in the NBA poised to get serious playing time and give me someone to root for. Jared Jeffries, Eric Gordon and DJ White.

The Knick still suck in a big way, but with a new coach and a new approach it seemed the JJ was going to get a larger role in the offense. Until training camp began and he broke his leg. He’s out 6-8 weeks.

Eric Gordon has the chance, playing for the lowly Clippers to make a real contribution and be a break out player in his rookie season. Until training camp started and he landed on some one’s ankle and roled his ankle.

How often does that happen?

Every time.

He’s out a couple of weeks.

And then the coups de gras. DJ White is going to miss 4-6 MONTHS after a benign growth was discovered on his jaw. He has to have surgery, which will include taking a bone graft from his hip and attaching that bone to his face.

Now we’re down to 0.0 players ready to make an impact as the season begins and my interest in the NBA on hold for at least a little while longer.

Redactions (redacted)

June 6, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

I don’t know who performed the redactions on the Case Summary (redacted), here’s a suggestion. If it is your intention, by redacting names from the beginning of the document, to protect the identity of the people providing the information 1.) Don’t put them in alphabetical order and 2.) Don’t provide a description of the person.

In the interest of not publicly exposing the people that Indiana University or the Indy Star are trying to protect, I won’t reveal the answer to the world’s easiest puzzle, but if you pull up a copy of last year’s roster and use the power of the alphabet you should be able solve it yourself in under 3 minutes.

Good (redacted)

If you see Kelvin Sampson on the street…

March 14, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

Please punch him right in the mouth.

I hold Kelvin Sampson personally responsible for the disastrous end to this season. This is what happens when you break the rules. You stupid cheating son of a bitch. Fuck you. Fuck you right in your stupid cheating mouth.

If you never get another job coaching anything I don’t think that will be enough. You and your children should remain unemployed for all of eternity. Also your children should be sterile and your line should end so that future generations should not have to suffer the consequences of your rule breaking, lying, deceitful ways.

You have done more damage to this University and this program than any other person in the history of Indiana.

Fuck you.

The Mega Powers Explode!!

January 10, 2008by Jeff TaylorLeave a comment

Knowing full well that the analogy blows up if you follow it all the way to it’s conclusion*, but after watching DJ White Hulk up enough to body slam the 500 pound giant into the center of the ring against Michigan last night while EJ climbed to the top rope, raised both hands high above his head and dropped the flying elbow right on the Wolverines (OOH YEAH!), I’m convinced of just one thing. If there’s a better inside out combination in college basketball that EJ and DJ, I’ll eat my hat.

These guys just destroyed Michigan the other night, and if this kind of play continues, we’re going to run through most of the Big Ten with only a few hiccups. If this team could ever get healthy it would truly be a sight to see.

* To follow it all the way through the conclusion of this story would have to be EJ thinking that DJ made a move on his girl. EJ would get so pissed about the whole thing that during a key game EJ would be hurt and tired, and DJ would be calling hard for the ball, but EJ wouldn’t give it to him. This slight would cost us the game and eventually lead to the two of them playing 1 on 1 for a live and PPV audience.