I heard a story today I found, on its face, quite gross, but on reflection poses a few interesting questions.

It seems that at one point last year a group of seventh grade boys collected $280 and paid another student to drink his own piss.

I know your reaction, like mine, was yuck.

I also know that your second reaction was, "That’s not enough money for me to do that."

Followed by a quick mental calculation of how much it would cost for you to WaterWorld.

I know this because when I heard the story, that’s what I thought, then when I told Adam, that’s what he thought.

Usually, Adam and I following a similar train of thought is neither abnormal, nor indicative of a larger pattern, but here I think it holds.

Before you judge this boy too harshly, I’d like you to consider a few mitigating factors.

1.) Drinking a cup of your own urine is not, as far as I know, lethal, which means that there’s a price at which you would do this. It might be a really high price, but there’s a price.

2.) $280 seems like a small sum of money, but consider that these are not adult dollars. These are 7th grade dollars. When I was in 7th grade I used to go my future High School on Saturdays following home football games to search for change that had fallen out of people’s pockets the night before. If I found $5 I would be ecstatic. $280 would have been a king’s ransom.

3.) What is $280 7th grade dollars adjusted to adult dollars? I’m going to Packer Method this thing and call it at least a 5:1 adult to kid ratio. Meaning that $280 kid dollars is roughly $1400 adult dollars. It may be even more lopsided than that. Is $1400 in the ball park for your price?

What do you think? Was I right about your reaction? Did the kid get suckered, or get over?


  1. piss is good. especially mine. I agree with what you said that it is a lot of money. what if that piss tasted good like mine. they kid who got the $280, could bottle it and sell it too. the piss business is a gold mine.
    i like this kid for his actions and I applaud him

  2. ha ha ha ha as Cleveland in FM would say “oh that’s nasty”. If I had eaten Asparagus in the last 24 hrs, I’d def say no. I’d probably say no all around, but hey if i was stuck on a boat like K.C. I might have to boil my piss too , who knows Jeff..who knows everyone has a price, mine would just be survival or at least 6 figures.

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